Awful

Of course, things could always be worse. But right now I feel awful. And I'm about to start complaining, so don't read this unless you want to hear about it.

After Dave's first day doing seasonal work at Toys R Us (sorry, I can't make the stupid 'R' go backwards like it's meant to), both of us thought it would be much nicer for him to not go back again. I wanted him for the holidays without anything to pull him away, and he wanted to get the crap out of that hectic place and not worry about working for a couple of weeks. But we can't. Isn't real life a pain? Doesn't it suck how we have to live from paycheck to paycheck? And let me tell you, the longer you are married, the more bills like to attach themselves to you and become a part of your life. It's not realistic to just take 3 weeks off from work without any kind of financial compensation. After all, there are rent and internet and food and electric and gas and everything else (and I don't know why I listed 'internet' before 'food.' That's just messed up). But there is so, so much to pay for now.

So we sighed and went to Target to buy him a red polo shirt to replace the size XL button-up hideous shirt Toys R Us had provided him (which they forced him to tuck in, by the way...ugh), and yesterday he went to work at 5 p.m. I had gone to work at 2 that day, and finished up at 6. He was supposed to stay until midnight at the big 'R Us. Fine. I got a ride home with my sister Larissa and hung out with her, watching The Office and wrapping presents and such. I appreciated her company. Jana joined the "keep Karen company" cause, too. It wasn't so bad after all, you know? Hanging out with my sisters is always awesome. But I missed Dave. And for some treacherous reason fate handed me one more awful thing: a cold. As soon as I got off work it hit me. I've been in agony since 6 last night, and at Larissa's I was sniffling and sneezing and generally being one gigantic runny nose named Karen. Making it worse, Dave called on his break and said that since he was closing, he'd probably end up staying past 1 a.m instead of midnight. Blah!!

Jana went home and I sacked out on Larissa's couch waiting for Dave to call. After 2 a.m. he finally did, and he picked me up. He said that his next shift would start at 11 a.m. the next day (well, that day technically). I kind of freaked out. By the time we got home and went to bed after 3 a.m., it wasn't even possible for him to get a full night's sleep before starting his next shift. How can they schedule him like that, without a chance to recover from the last shift? They are evil, evil toy-making people.

But he happily and diligently went back to that place at 11 today. He's so good. I mean, he really wants to take care of our family. I feel bad about the whole thing, especially since I'm sick and don't think I can make it to my job today. And what I really want is for him to be here with me all day, to do nothing and worry about nothing. Thanks Dave...I love you so much for what you're doing!

Enough. Excuse this mess of "writing," I'm really sick. I think I'll go blow my nose now.